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Parenting & Education in Ireland

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Parenting & Education

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Separated parent trouble

re... : Separated parent trouble           reply
27/05/2009 15:05 - Behaviour / Discipline
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I understand totally how you feel. When one of our children is feeling hurt or pain, we feel it just as much if not more! Sometimes the mix in the school just doesn´t suit a child and they cannot make friends. I think that the best approach in this situation is to make sure that you help your child to build up confidence and to learn how to mix with other children. Can you get her involved in a local club, classes, summer camps etc? She will get a chance to meet with other children her age and hopefully make friends. Making friends and attending activities will also increase her confidence and also, teach her how to be in a friendship(s). She will learn how to compromise etc., and that will be of huge benefit when she goes back to school in September.
With regard to moving her - if the secondary school she will attend in 2010 will be a mix of schools and not just people from the school she is in now, I would hold off. When children start secondary, my experience is that they make a new group of friends so this move may be enough to break the cycle.
Spend as much time as you can with her shopping, chatting, cooking together and so on and this will also help her confidence and deepen the relationship between you both which will be of great benefit when she goes into secondary and the teenage years.




re : Separated parent trouble           reply
26/05/2009 10:37 - Behaviour / Discipline
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It is very difficult to give a clear yes or no to this idea because you know your child better than anyone else- you didn´t say if the class teacher/ principal were very receptive and tried to help or not. Generally, I think dealing with it without her moving would be best but really, if you think it can´t be resolved I suppose moving might be the answer. I always feel sorry for kids not living at home though - would there be any other day school she could go to- then she could still come home to you in the evening.



Separated parent trouble           reply
12/05/2009 19:42 - Behaviour / Discipline
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Can anyone offer any advice for me. I am at my wits end and dont know what to do. Our 11 year old daughter has been having ongoing difficiulties in her primary school that she has attended since junior infants. She is an only child and has a strong personality and doesnt seem to click with any people in her small school. Everyday she comes home complaining about one child or another and this has gone on for the past few years on and off. I have tried talking to her and going in to the school, but its not really a bulling problem just a case of she doesnt seem to have any friends. Its very upsetting as her mom to listen to this. However I thought I may have a solution in that there is a boarding priamary school about 2 hours drive away and she would be home every weekend. I thought this would be a nice new start for her as it would be in September and she would only be doing 6th class there and help with her study and sports etc, the big problem is her Dad is not having any of it. We cannot agree on this and it is causing major friction, he feels that she would be runing away from her problems and said to me it was like me running away from our marriage.I am so upset by all this as she is with me during the week and him weekends so its me she mostly says it to. I am trying to be as open and honest with her, but what can I do? We just cant agree




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