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My child doesnt speak in school

My child doesnt speak in school           reply
09/05/2019 11:46 - Behaviour / Discipline
Hello there,

Just looking for a bit of advice and wondering if anyone else has been through the same thing.
My 9 year old daughter moved house last summer and started in a new school in September. Shortly in to the school term I was contacted by the school to say that they were concerned about her. Academically she is on top of things- Top speller, Mental about mental maths, Avid reader etc but won´t interact with the others from her class and stands alone at yard time. Initially I was worried but not overly concerned as she has had so many changes in such a short space of time. Her father also has disappeared and she hasn´t seen him since Father´s day so I know that is a huge rejection. She has also gone from having female teachers all through her old school and now has a male teacher who seems very nice but this is another change for her to have a man teaching her.
On top of this her friends from her old school have not been great for keeping in contact so she hasn´t much of a social life outside of school either. I sometimes feel like if anything happened to me she would have no one. I am her world.
She is an only child with no cousins.
I accept all party invitations in a bid to improve her friendships with her classmates and I have met some of the children and they seem very friendly and nice. I don´t understand why she won´t speak. She was very popular in her old school and had a lovely circle of friends and was never stuck for someone to play with although definately quieter than the others. She told me that she doesn´t speak in school and when i asked her why she just shrugs her shoulders. I know she really wants to have friends and be accepted and maybe has a bit of a fear around this. I thought by this stage of the year she would be well settled in. I have tried initiating playdates but none of the other parents seem too keen. Maybe they think my daughter is rude because she is so quiet I don´t know. I have started her in a weekly drama class to try and bring her out of herself and she has recently started Play therapy too which Im hoping will help. I mentioned to the Play therapist that perhaps my daughter might have a phobia around speaking in certain situations - a condition called Selective Mutism. She said that we wouldn´t put a label on it just yet. Im wondering if other people have been through this and if they have any advice for me. My daughter is so lovely and goofy at home. I just wish she could relax and be herself and not care about what other people think

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