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Parenting & Education in Ireland

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Parenting & Education

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Parenting at Christmas Time



Parenting at Christmas can be a very stressful and challenging experience. With so much to do, presents to buy, trees to decorate, cards to write, and the Christmas dinner to plan, as well as it being a time of high expectations – we all expect to have a happy, loving perfect Christmas - parents can become overwhelmed and when the day finally arrives, feel too stressed out to enjoy it.

I believe that Christmas time should be as enjoyable and as stress-free as possible; a time for having fun and making memories as a family. So I have put together some ideas to help make the run up to Christmas and Christmas day itself relaxing and pleasurable.

First things first – prioritise what needs to be done. Make a list of everything that needs to be done between now and Christmas as well as on Christmas day i.e. food shopping, gifts to get, decorations to put up, food to prepare, cooking times etc. etc…when we break things down we can feel less stressed and overwhelmed and more able to manage.

Next – delegate. I know, I know, if you want something done properly then you have to do it yourself right? Wrong! As long as there is food on the table and people enjoying themselves then there is no right or wrong. It’s about letting go of the expectation of having a perfect Christmas and instead having a good enough Christmas filled with fun and family. Involve your children in the preparations – have them decorate the tree or write the cards or help with the shopping and cooking; not only is this a valuable way of creating memories and traditions but it also teaches young people the value of contributing to the family.

Dealing with pester power – we are living in a world where much emphasis is placed on what we own and having the latest gadgets and gear. No time is this more prevalent then the run up to Christmas, when a trip to the shops can turn into a battle ground between parent and children as they spot all of the things they want or their friends have. This can be challenging for parents, especially during these harder times, however it can also be an opportunity to teach children the value of money and the reality that we cannot always get what we want when we want it; a very important life skill.

We do not have to give out to them, or tell them how ungrateful they are being, instead we can empathise with them and the disappointment they are experiencing at not getting everything they wanted or what everyone else has and also use the occasion to talk to them about ways they themselves may be able to buy the item. We might say something like ‘I wish I had enough money to get you that toy, I know it’s so fast and shiny, but unfortunately we can only get one big present this year. How about we think of some other ways that you might be able to buy it yourself’

Dealing with children being at home when they start fighting more often and complaining to you that they are bored - having some activities organised, maybe trips out over the Christmas period can help alleviate the boredom and give them less time for squabbling with each other or maybe have a fun bowl with a list of games they have or things they can do inside that they can choose from at these times.

Remember Christmas day is about having fun, so relax, let go and enjoy yourself, just let Christmas happen.

Finally don’t forget to Breathe – if you feel you are becoming stressed or overwhelmed, it is important for you to take 5 minutes and breathe deeply. Tell yourself everything will be okay and sit down and have a cup of tea; even Santa himself stops for a break on his busiest night of the year!!

Wishing you and you’re a very Peaceful Christmas and a Prosperous New Year
Clare Crowley Collier, Therapist, Educator & Facilitator for Teenagers and Parents

For details of our upcoming Parenting courses for Kids & Teens in January & February, check out FamilyMatters.ie






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